Wearing All the Hats: A Therapist’s Perspective on Supporting Burnt-Out Houston Mothers

By Kate Tamminga, LPC-A — The Flourishing Way, Houston & The Woodlands

The Many Hats Houston Mothers Wear

As women, we wear many hats. Some we chose, others we inherited, and a few we didn’t even realize we were putting on until they became part of our daily rhythm. Personally, I wear the hats of mother, wife, therapist, volunteer, and friend. Each role asks something different of me and calls for different parts of myself to show up with energy, focus, and care.

Over time, I’ve learned that while these roles can be deeply fulfilling, they can also become overwhelming. They stretch us in every direction. And without slowing down, those same roles can start to define us in ways that feel more confining than empowering.

This is something I see often in the women and mothers I work with here in Houston and The Woodlands.

The Invisible Weight Mothers Carry

Many of the mothers I meet aren’t in crisis. They’re functioning, showing up, and keeping everyone afloat. But underneath, there’s a steady hum of exhaustion. They’re doing everything right—managing meals, carpools, school forms, work deadlines, and birthdays. They’ve become experts at running on autopilot but rarely pause long enough to notice how disconnected they feel from themselves.

They’re striving to be the best mom, the supportive partner, the dependable friend. Yet somewhere in the middle of all that giving, their own sense of self begins to fade. It’s not that they don’t love their lives. They’re simply tired of living them at this pace.

If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. So many Houston moms feel this same quiet burnout—high-functioning on the outside, but running on empty inside.

Rediscovering Who You Are Beyond “Mom”

In therapy, I often ask: Who are you right now? Who have you been? Who do you want to become?

It’s not unusual for moms to pause before answering. Their first responses are usually “a mom,” “a wife,” or “a teacher.” But beneath those roles are parts of them that have been waiting for air—artists, adventurers, writers, dreamers.

Rediscovering these parts isn’t about adding more to your plate. It’s about reconnecting with joy, curiosity, and autonomy. It’s about realizing you’re allowed to exist outside of service to others.

When we give these parts permission to breathe again, we start to feel more alive, more grounded, and more connected—not just to our families, but to ourselves.

When “Doing It All” Isn’t Sustainable

Houston moms are some of the most dedicated and capable people I know. They balance demanding careers, long commutes, and family schedules with incredible strength. But that same strength can become a trap.

The belief that we have to do it all is deeply ingrained, and it’s costing many mothers their peace. We weren’t meant to carry this much without support. Sustainable motherhood doesn’t mean doing everything perfectly. It means learning to focus on what matters most and finding ways to honor your energy and needs.

Therapy helps make that shift—from survival mode to something that feels steadier and more sustainable.

Aligning with Your Core Values

In sessions, I often ask clients what truly matters to them, not in theory but in how they spend their time.

Many mothers realize their lives don’t reflect their deepest values. They value connection, yet feel isolated. They value rest, but can’t remember the last time they truly rested. They value presence, but spend most of their days rushing from one thing to the next.

This mismatch creates a quiet unease, a feeling that something is off even when life looks fine from the outside.

In therapy, we explore where these patterns come from and what small changes might bring life back into alignment. Because when your time and energy reflect what you genuinely care about, a sense of peace naturally follows.

Practicing Presence in Everyday Life

One of the most healing things therapy offers burnt-out mothers is the reminder that presence is possible. You don’t have to earn rest. You don’t have to prove your worth by staying busy. You don’t have to optimize every corner of your life to deserve peace.

Presence doesn’t happen by accident. It grows through intentional pauses and boundaries, often in small ways that fit real life.

Start with a mindful moment. Drink your coffee before the day begins. Step outside for fresh air. Drive in silence instead of catching up on calls. Say no to something that drains your energy.

In the constant motion of Houston life, these small acts of presence allow you to slow down enough to hear yourself again.

Therapy as a Place to Reclaim Yourself

Therapy is a place to lay it all down—the invisible weight, the guilt, the expectations—and remember that you are still you beneath it all. It’s where you can reconnect with what you want, what you need, and who you are becoming.

It’s also a space to build boundaries that protect your peace, to find language for your needs, and to make sense of the stories that shaped you. Whether you’re navigating burnout, anxiety, or a sense of disconnection, therapy helps you come home to yourself again.

You deserve more than getting by. You deserve to feel like yourself.

Finding Support at The Flourishing Way

At The Flourishing Way, we support women and mothers throughout Houston, The Woodlands, and Spring who are ready to stop running on autopilot and begin living with more intention, ease, and clarity.

Our therapists provide trauma-informed, compassionate care to help you reconnect with your authentic self and find meaningful change. We offer:

Every session is designed to help you reconnect with your values, rediscover your identity, and feel grounded in your daily life.

If you’re ready to feel like yourself again, we’d be honored to support you.